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The Devil's Dictionary:    

Definition of Limb

  LIMB   noun
The branch of a tree or the leg of an American woman.
  'Twas a pair of boots that the lady bought,
      And the salesman laced them tight
      To a very remarkable height --
  Higher, indeed, than I think he ought --
      Higher than can be right.
  For the Bible declares -- but never mind:
      It is hardly fit
  To censure freely and fault to find
  With others for sins that I'm not inclined
      Myself to commit.
  Each has his weakness, and though my own
      Is freedom from every sin,
      It still were unfair to pitch in,
  Discharging the first censorious stone.
  Besides, the truth compels me to say,
  The boots in question were made that way.
  As he drew the lace she made a grimace,
      And blushingly said to him:
  'This boot, I'm sure, is too high to endure,
  It hurts my -- hurts my -- limb.'
  The salesman smiled in a manner mild,
  Like an artless, undesigning child;
  Then, checking himself, to his face he gave
  A look as sorrowful as the grave,
      Though he didn't care two figs
  For her paints and throes,
  As he stroked her toes,
  Remarking with speech and manner just
  Befitting his calling:  'Madam, I trust
      That it doesn't hurt your twigs.'

B. Percival Dike

Devil's Dictionarydefinition from:
The Devil's Dictionary
by Ambrose Bierce, 1911


Last updated: 9/3/2011 12:48:30